Women, the priesthood and some declarations of faith

I've been called a feminist many times in my life. I think it was a compliment most of the time.

But "feminist" is a loaded word, and it's hard to use it as a blanket term when there are so many varying levels of feminism. So let me clarify:

• I believe that men and women have equal and different roles in society, the workplace and in the home.
• I believe men and women should be treated with equal respect and dignity.
• I believe women and girls should be well-educated contributors to society, the workplace and the home.
• I believe that men and woman have equal access to the scriptures, personal revelation and temple ordinances and as such are equal in the eyes of God. 
• I believe my contribution to gospel study and service is equal to my husband's.
• I accept responsibility for teaching my daughters how to be contributors to society, the workplace and the home.
• I believe women are equal partakers of the blessings and powers of the priesthood.
• I do not believe women need to be ordained to the priesthood.

I came to this final conclusion a few weeks ago when I first discovered the Ordain Women website. I read the profiles of some of the people there, and I honestly believe that many of them are firm believers who have strong testimonies of the gospel. I love them. I think they are good people who struggle with questions just like I do, even if our struggles are different. We all have crosses to bear.

But as I read the reasons they gave for ordaining women to the priesthood, I couldn't stop thinking one simple sentence: I disagree. Then a voice in my mind asked me this equally simple question: Why?

And I made it a matter of prayer and of study. Because if I believe something so foundational to my being, if I claim to be any sort of a feminist, if I am taking such a stand on a rather controversial topic, I'd better be able to back it up.

After several weeks of studying, prayer, pondering and conversation, I've found a few answers. They don't paint a complete picture, but they bring me peace, which is enough for me to go on. Do you mind if I share?

Ordaining women to the priesthood wouldn't help feminism's cause. I believe that in its truest sense, feminism is about celebrating womanhood. I find it ironic that many of the "victories" of the feminist movement have actually diminished womanhood by making us more like men. Insisting that women must become like men to be equal to them only strengthens the idea that men are inherently better. Besides, ordaining women to the priesthood would only double the number of people trying to do the same job in building the kingdom of God.

Women have a closer relationship with the priesthood that it seems. On this point, I reference the temple. Without going into inappropriate detail, I will say that I have learned in my temple worship that men and women are equal before God. He makes all of the blessings of the priesthood and its ordinances and covenants available to men and women alike. The crowning priesthood ordinance—the sealing—is received only by a man and a woman together. If you study the priesthood with an open heart, and if you're trying to find evidence of how God invites women to participate in the priesthood, I promise you will find it.

We can't understand everything now. In my study, I came across this talk by Elder Ballard. He said:

"Why are men ordained to priesthood offices and not women? President Gordon B. Hinckley explained that it was the Lord, not man, 'who designated that men in His Church should hold the priesthood' and that it was also the Lord who endowed women with 'capabilities to round out this great and marvelous organization, which is the Church and kingdom of God.'"

Then Elder Ballard added, significantly:

"When all is said and done, the Lord has not revealed why He has organized His Church as He has."

That's a frustrating answer, to be sure. But it is an important part of my overall understanding. There is a lot I don't understand about the Church and a lot that I do. But in questions like this, the frustrating answer is sometimes the best one. Joseph Smith was a prophet. Christ told Joseph this is how His Church was meant to be organized, and He hasn't told any of Joseph's successors otherwise.

I know enough. I don't know everything there is to know about anything that could ever come up in reference to the Church, ever. But I do know that Christ lives and that He communicates with His living prophets. They will tell me what I need to know. It's like Elder Holland said: "[T]his is a divine work in process, with the manifestations and blessings of it abounding in every direction, so please don't hyperventilate if from time to time issues arrive that need to be examined, understood, and resolved. They do and they will. In this Church, what we know will always trump what we do not know" (emphasis his).

Maybe my thoughts will help you come to your own peace in this Ordain Women thing. Maybe they won't. But I've come to my own sort of peace in all this, and I hope everyone in the Church (and the whole world!) can be compassionate as we all seek answers of our own.